Well! I guess now would be a good time to update it! Lots has happened! Ah, where to begin, where to begin~?
I guess I'll start with whatever comes to mind. Uhm, so, I discovered some things about myself a few months ago. This whole time, I have discovered so much. The first thing I'd like to mention is how I'm gender fluid. I kinda always knew, considering that I would slip into a male persona, but I just didn't think on it much. Only recently had I gotten curious enough to look it up, to find a word for my definition of myself. And I finally found it. I consider myself of either the male or female gender, depending on my mood, though recently, I've been feeling very masculine. Or at least, more male, I guess? Ah, it's confusing to explain. I really don't care what you see me as; male, female, or neither. And as such, I don't care how you refer to me as. Some refer to me as 'he', others 'she', and then there are those who refer to me as 'they' or 'them'. You can choose whatever you like, I truthfully don't give a damn XD
So, onto the next thing... Another thing I realized? I am asexual. Meaning I don't enjoy sex. The thought of it is kinda... meh to me. I don't want to go too into detail with this one, so let's just leave it at that.
However, something big I realized... I would not mind a romantic relationship with a guy. So male, female, doesn't matter. I don't want to have sex with you, but cuddles and kisses? While still being completely and totally in love with you? More than okay with me! So yeah. I really don't care about the gender or sex of a person, but their personality and how we work together.
And oh geeze, how could I forget about this...? Kids? Yeah, I found out that I don't hate them as much as I thought I did. I'm not as annoyed by them, if they're not screaming their head off. I... kinda want one. I don't want to give birth to one, hell no. I do not want to go through that! But rather, I think I'd like to adopt one... But, much later in life, haha! I am definitely not ready to take on a child anytime soon! But maybe one day, in the far future, I just might adopt one.
... And I think that's about it for realizations. Yup.
Now onto other things!
I've gotten really back into fandoms recently. I even have a few RP blogs on tumblr! Hiccup, Tsuna (KHR), and a joint blog for America and Italy. I've been having a lot of fun with it. I haven't been roleplaying as much as I'd like to (in fact, I'm extremely slow with replies), but all in all, it's really fun! The people I've met through these fandoms... Dear gods, they are amazing. And ah, man, have I ever gotten back into Hetalia... Pfft... I'm actually watching it with one of my friends (a friend in France) right now, rewatching the entire series. We're just about to start season 4 x3 And Hetaloid-! I can't stop listening to it! *A* Even as I'm typing this, I'm listening to America and Italy sing Happy Synthesizer. Speaking of which, I still need to learn more to that dance...
I've gotten closer to some of the people around here, too, and am actually starting to consider them friends. It's... kinda weird for me... It's really hard for me to consider real life people friends. But somehow, it's happening.
My grandmother is moving in next month, or the month after. She was supposed to move in this month, but it was pushed back... I'm very happy, though, because I love my grandmother <3 She's really awesome, and my mom is fully convinced that she's going to bring a cockatiel with her. (Since I want one so bad and my grandmother is kinda impulsive and has already showed signs of planning it out.) I'm... kinda hoping for it, but at the same time, I'm not getting my hopes up, either. I can most certainly wait until I move out.
My hair is so short now! <3 I'm surprised I haven't uploaded pictures of it yet! Ah, I guess I'll have to do that, huh? I have a few I guess I could use, but they're all crappy phone pictures XD;; Eh, oh well. Whatever works, right? But, yeah. My hair's extremely short, to appease my male side, though I can still style it to look feminine for my female side to be happy. I'm going to be bleaching it to a near-white sometime, when we have the money. So excited~ I really wanna see what it looks like~ If I don't like it, it'll grow out. I'm planning on keeping it this short, after all.
So all in all, I've been having a lot of fun! But, I've been taking care of things as well.
My last class for this certificate is going smoothly. I'm ahead of the class, and almost done with my website already! Haha! I'll be working on it more next semester, but I kinda realized that this whole web design thing just isn't for me. I'll be switching majors next semester, and attending a different college with my brother, who is graduating this summer. I've decided to pursue something I've always, since the beginning of time, had an interest in. English. I'm debating whether or not I wanna try to become a Creative Writing teacher, but we'll just have to see
Hmm... Let's see, let's see...
Well. I'm sure many of you already know this. Especially if you've seen her journals recently. But Rhia and I broke up at the beginning of February. She moved out and is living with some friends now. She has a new girlfriend and life is much better for her, so I'm happy for her. I feel really bad that we had to take her phone back, but we couldn't keep paying for it... I'm just happy she has somewhere to stay. I offered for her to stay here with us until she had enough money to move out - and my parents had even said they wouldn't charge her the money for utilities and food - but she didn't want to do that... So, I'm glad she's happy and lives under a stable roof.
I, on the other hand, will be staying with my mother and father until I finish college and get enough money to move out. I'm going to be taking things slow, though, so I can ease myself into it rather than plunging right in. I'm learning everything I need to know from my parents just so I won't screw myself over. As far as relationships go... I do have a crush on someone - and dear gods, she's such a sweet girl - but I won't be taking it any farther than that. Maybe in the future, if things go well, but it's only a small crush on both of our ends. We're both interested in each other. But not enough to start a relationship over. But I'm kinda happy with this. We get along pretty nicely. We have basically the same interests, and she's so funny and sweet. Very nervous and shy, but dear gods, is it cute <3
She actually confessed her crush to me over anon [/chuckles] And after talking to her a bit through there, I found out she was one of my friends. We've been talking... a lot recently, haha. I'm sure I've killed my phone over ten times by now, just texting her! Pfft!
Oh, right, this is about updates. Pfft. Sorry XD
Well, then. Another thing that happened? Complete wipe of my hard drive. So much fun, right? Not. ._. I lost so many of my files... I was able to save many of them, but over half of them were completely deleted. I'm trying to pull back together what I can, and I've already gotten basically I can salvage. Now all I need to do is recreate my iTunes playlists, put the CDs back on there, and go through YouTube to see if I can find many of the Vocaloid songs I lost. (I lost all of them... There were too many to move to the external hard drive.) Wallpapers, too, I need to search for. Right now, I've only gathered HetaOni ones - another fandom I've been getting back into - and would like to have more than that. Eh, I'll get to it sometime...
... I still haven't checked my Skyrim files... I'm scared to... I really hope Taenor isn't gone...
Moving on. As you guys can tell, I've been cosplaying as Hiccup <3 I'm even going to wear him into class tomorrow~! If I have the motivation to change into him... I have a few other cosplays planned that I will be doing as soon as I get the money or materials x3 My next one is going to be Jack Frost, the hoodie of which will be made by my bestie in return for me sewing up her Jackson vest and cloak. I'm so excited, omfg~ It'll be a very easy cosplay to make, and if I get my hair bleached and I actually like it, I can just style my own hair to look like his~
... I think that's it, really. I can't think of what else to add here... If there's anything else, I'll be sure to add it c:
Love you all~